hate at the same time… I don’t understand the contradiction I’m living in all the time… Who am I among all these?!
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
What does “borderline” mean?
As the name suggests, “borderline” means being on the edge or borderline.
Sometimes the person seems normal and fine, other times they are on the edge of neurotic disorders like anxiety, depression, or OCD — and sometimes they may even show signs close to psychotic disorders like mania or schizophrenia.
This is primarily a personality disorder, meaning it is treated through psychotherapy — sessions that work on thoughts, behaviors, emotions, and lifestyle changes.
However, it is often accompanied by other disorders such as anxiety, depression, or OCD — and if those exist, medication may be used alongside therapy to address the other issues.
A person with BPD typically shows a range of symptoms:
- Impulsivity: Acting without thinking and often regretting actions later.
- Recklessness: Enjoying risky or adventurous behavior.
- Mood instability: Waking up feeling okay and suddenly becoming angry, bored, or deeply sad without clear reason.
- Intense guilt: Which can lead to self-harm behaviors like cutting — this gives them a sense of emotional relief.
- Fear of abandonment: They’re terrified of being left by the people they’re attached to. They constantly need reassurance from their partners that they won’t leave them.
- Low self-esteem and lack of confidence: Seeing themselves in a very negative light.
- Identity disturbance: They often don’t know what they want from life, have no clear plans or sense of direction, and feel lost.
- A deep need to be accepted, understood, and reassured — because the disorder is often rooted in childhood trauma, such as emotional neglect, family conflict, or abuse.
This disorder is more common among females than males.
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