My son is nervous and always fights with his father and doesn’t listen to anyone.
How should I deal with my teenage son?
Please… I kindly ask you… respect your son.
Respect my son? What do you mean? Who should respect whom?
Yes, of course, I know you are the father, but your son is also a human being and has dignity. Above all, your son will learn respect from you when you treat him with respect.
Please… I kindly ask you… make your son the number one in your life.
But he is my whole life! Who else am I doing all this for?
Please… I kindly ask you… be proud of your son and show him off in front of others so you can raise his self-confidence and a positive self-image, not to please your brother or your friend by insulting, humiliating, or breaking your son. If your son made a mistake, give him advice and guidance in private to preserve his dignity in front of others.
Don’t allow anyone, no matter who they are, to criticize or insult your son, even if it’s his uncle, or a man older than you — because your son’s dignity is part of your own dignity.
If your son doesn’t get the grades you expected, this is not the end of the world… it’s not a shame… nor did your son fail you.
It’s not the name of the college he gets into that should make you proud of your son… Many people are in prestigious colleges but lack upbringing, ethics, and personality.
My son, give your son respect for himself and others… trust him so he learns to trust himself and those around him.
Ask for his opinion and discuss things with him so he learns to take responsibility.
Let him make decisions and carry the responsibility of those decisions with your guidance… and if he makes mistakes, let him learn from them.
Be his friend and support him so he doesn’t seek someone else to learn from.
If you are close to your son, he will come back to you when he has a problem and will learn from your experiences.
Every human makes mistakes… nobody is an angel… don’t expect your son to be perfect or act ideally and say, “I want him to be the best person in the world.” You weren’t the best person in the world when you were his age… and no one is.
When your son behaves in a way that bothers you, think back a little and see… when you were his age, you wanted to be free, to play, to socialize, to make mistakes, to say no, to have a presence… you had a need for independence. Depending on the different stages of your age, remember how you were as a child to understand that what your son is doing or demanding is his right.
If your childhood was difficult and life is better now, it’s not necessary for your son to live the same life to “learn that life is not easy and you must work hard.” You worked hard to provide a decent life for your son and also taught him responsibility in different ways.
Whoever wants his son to be perfect is actually cancelling his spontaneity… cancelling his personality… and turning him into a programmed robot who just does the right thing. Then, when he grows up, he faces many difficulties interacting with people and life.
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